I’m a big fan of high-fat foods; fat tastes good, after all! And research has shown that some types of fats, like Omega-3s, can calm us and even have antidepressant effects. But other studies show that trans-fats, or partially hydrogenated oils, may make us feel aggressive, and that they can trigger inflammatory reactions that are linked to depression, heart disease and cancer. (I tried to talk about this a little bit at the end of my most recent appearance on Dr. Oz — [watch here] to see the blooper that they aired!)

Trans-fats are typically found in processed foods–particularly fried foods and packaged baked goods. Since aggression, depression, heart disease and cancer are not happiness habits, clearly what we eat affects our happiness.

Take Action: This week, make an effort to eat something high in a fat that is likely to make you feel good, such as something high in the omega-3 fatty acid DHA. DHA is found in oily fish, like trout and salmon. (If you are vegetarian, algae is the only DHA-rich vegetable source that I’m aware of.) Let that yummy smoked trout salad replace your side of french fries, chips, or (sigh) those cookies that came in a package.

Join the Discussion: Do you think trans-fat foods make you aggressive or depressed? Share your thoughts in the comments.

P.S. Need help weaning yourself from a fatty habit? Join Our Resolutions Group — Free! Over the years I’ve learned a lot of tricks for successfully keeping New Year’s resolutions. And in the last three years, the science around willpower and habits has made great advancements, which helps a lot. To share all I’ve learned, I’ve relaunched my free online course about making and keeping great New Year’s resolutions. Sign up now; it’s free for a limited time only.

Photo courtesy of mamaloco

 

Wondering which Happiness Tips were most popular in 2013?  Here are the top 5 Happiness Tips shared, viewed, liked and commented on the most!

5. Lower Your Expectations

4. Hardwire Happiness

3. Talk to Strangers

2. Lean into Difficult Emotions

…and the most popular Happiness Tip of 2013 was…

1.Develop Grit

Happy New Year, everyone!

This year, skip the New Year’s diet and do something fun.

I do understand why New Year’s resolutions don’t make a lot of people happy: They can be a source of failure, year after year. Folks often pick resolutions that are inherently unrewarding, that necessitate relentless hard work, or that remind them of their mortality in a way that makes them feel small instead of grateful. I know because I’ve made all of those mistakes.

But now? I firmly believe that New Year’s resolutions can be a lasting source of happiness. Personally, I use them to transform myself in small increments, taking turtle steps toward new habits. I begin slowly around the winter solstice, and inch myself toward a newer, better self. By spring, my new habits have taken hold, and the green leaves of growth unfurl.

What are you resolving for the New Year?  Is it something that will make you happier? (I write about my favorite happiness-inducing resolutions here, on my my Greater Good blog.) Inspire others by sharing your resolutions below.

Take Action: Join Our Resolutions Group — Free! Over the years I’ve learned a lot of tricks for successfully keeping New Year’s resolutions. And in the last three years, the science around willpower and habits has made great advancements, which helps a lot. To share all I’ve learned, I’ve created this online course about making and keeping great New Year’s resolutions. Sign up now; it’s free for a limited time only.

Cheers to making 2014 the BEST YEAR YET!

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukah! Happy Holidays, everyone!

Did that greeting just make you warm inside with thoughts of winter lights and family celebrations and Salvation Army bells ringing for the poor? Or did you flinch? If you felt like rolling your eyes just now, I blame the retailers who have been forcing the holidays on us since the clock struck midnight on Halloween. This time of year usually generates 25 percent of all retail profits, and it seems every year advertisers redouble their holiday efforts to sell us stuff we don’t need.

Here’s the thing: though fraught with materialism, this season has more potential than any other to foster happiness.

Religious and culturally meaningful holidays spawn loads of family traditions–baking cookies, picking out a tree, caroling, parties to catch up with people you love–and it is family traditions and togetherness that offer lasting happiness. Social scientists have studied this specifically, and they’ve found that the people who spend more time with family and have more religious experiences during the holidays are happier than those who focus on spending money and receiving gifts.

But the most powerful way to foster happiness over the holidays is by helping others. The “helper’s high,” as one researcher has called it, that we get when we reach out to other people is considerably healthier than the (ahem) other adult highs in which we tend to indulge during the holidays. According to altruism researcher Stephen Post, this is because altruism creates deep and positive relationships. It distracts us from our own problems and the anxiety that comes from being preoccupied with ourselves. Helping others gives our own lives greater meaning and purpose. Altruistic behavior cultivates loads of positive emotions–think gratitude, awe, optimism, faith, compassion, and love–and those feelings displace negative emotions like guilt, envy and sadness.

Take Action: This year, create your own family tradition that involves giving to others. Check out this video with my friend Kelly Corrigan for inspiration.

Join the discussion: What are some of your favorite holiday traditions? Share your best ones in the comments.

If we want to be happy we need to practice gratitude deliberately and consistently — or we’ll end up feeling entitled rather than satisfied.

Here are my three favorite gratitude practices:

(1) On Thanksgiving, we appreciate each other by writing on our dinner table place cards. The kids make giant construction paper place cards for each guest, and as people arrive and mingle, we each take some time to sit down at the table and write on the inside of each place card something that we love or appreciate about them.

(2) Several times a week, I take a photograph of something I find beautiful or inspiring, or something I feel grateful for.

(3) Everyday, I ask my kids about three good things. They might share good things that happened to them that day, or good things they did themselves, or even something good that hasn’t happened yet, that they are anticipating.

Take Action: If you don’t already have one, pick a gratitude practice to start this week. Make a plan to make your gratitude practice a habit (don’t skip this part). What will remind you to practice?

Join the discussion: How do you foster gratitude in your life? Inspire others by leaving a comment.

Do something generous this week, and stretch if you can. Be more generous than usual.

Research is clear that giving to others improves our health and well-being. When we are generous, our outlook on life changes, and ironically, we begin to “perceive others more positively,” says Sonja Lyubomirsky in this video from our Science of a Meaningful Life series.

Take action: Find someone or something to which you can give generously today. Give your time, lend your expertise, or make a financial contribution to a cause that needs your support. You’ll be happier for it!

Join the discussion: Do you feel fulfilled when you give of your time or resources? Share in the comments.

To keep our ancestors alive, the brain evolved a “negativity bias” that makes it like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones, as my friend Rick Hanson always says. This might have been good for survival, but today this bias makes us needlessly stressed, worried, irritated, and blue.

The inner strengths we need for the long road of life are mainly built from positive experiences. But because of the negativity bias, positive experiences often flow through our brains like water through a sieve, with no lasting value.

If you’re starting to think this is the most depressing happiness tip I’ve ever written, never fear! Rick Hanson, PhD, a neuropsychologist and bestselling author, has a wonderful new book coming out in a couple of weeks. It’s called Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm, and Confidence, and it lays out a simple way to use everyday experiences to change your brain so that you experience more happiness, love, confidence, and peace.

Here’s the gist of how to “Take in the Good,” as Hanson calls it:

1. Notice the good things that are all around you.  Practice actively looking for the positive: Those flowers we planted in the fall are blooming; our neighbor was so nice to help us with a difficult project; work was particularly fun today. Regular gratitude practices help with this.  The key, according to Hanson, is to “turn positive facts into positive experiences.”
2. Draw out—really savor—those positive experiences. The idea is not just to hold something positive in our awareness for as long as possible, but also to remember and re-experience the positive emotions that go along with positive experiences.
3. Let it all really sink in. Imagine that the positive experience “is entering deeply into your mind and body, like the sun’s warmth into a T-shirt, water into a sponge, or a jewel placed in a treasure chest in your heart.”

Drawing on neuroscience, evolutionary psychology, and wisdom from the contemplative traditions, Hardwiring Happiness shows you how to overcome the negativity bias and get good experiences into the brain where it can use them. By taking just a few extra seconds to stay with an everyday positive experience – the deliciousness of a cookie, the calming in a single breath, the warmth of a friend – we can turn good moments into a great brain that gives us a durable resilience and well-being.

Take Action: Take 30 seconds to “take in the good” of a positive experience before you drift off to sleep tonight.

Join the Discussion: Have you tried this practice? If so, share your experience in the comments.

PS: If you pre-order a copy of Hardwiring Happiness before the book comes out on October 8^th, you can receive the free bonus of Dr. Hanson’s “Your Best Brain” multimedia presentation by visiting www.rickhanson.net/hardwiringhappiness.

The “Your Best Brain” multimedia presentation includes audio and slide sets from the “Your Best Brain” Workshop and will give you practical, research-based ways to learn how to “Be On Your Own Side,” “Take In The Good,” and “Come Home to Happiness.”

When we look at people who are at the top of their field, they all have grit: persistence and passion for their long-term goals. But this doesn’t mean that they burn the midnight oil day-in and day-out in pursuit of achievement.

Just as elite performers are strategic about what they practice, they are also strategic about how long they practice for. The good news (I think) is that it doesn’t work to just practice until our fingers bleed or our mind spins or our muscles give out—for hour upon hour upon hour of endless, relentless, intrinsically boring practice.

Here’s my favorite part of a series I’ve written on elite performance: Super-high-achievers sleep significantly more than the average American. On average, Americans get only 6.5 hours of sleep per night. Elite performers tend to get 8.6 hours of sleep a night; elite athletes need even more sleep. One study showed that when Stanford swimmers increased their sleep time to 10 hours per 24 hours (sleeping longer at night and often taking a nap), they felt happier, more energetic — and their performance in the pool improved dramatically.

Take Action: Are you tired? If so, lay down. (Although it may feel like it, the world will not stop spinning just because you have.) Take a nap. Hit the sack early tonight: your work and family will thank you for it!

Join the Discussion: Do you find you’re at your best when you get more sleep? Share in the comments.

Feature image courtesy of NavyJackBell.